Eric has been after me for a while to post on the website, but he’s been doing such a thorough and amazing job, I’ve left it up to him. Also with all the emotional stuff we’ve suffered through, I can’t put into words our feelings as well as he’s been able to. I will say that the last two months have by far been the worst and simultaneously most blessed two months of my life. We’ve been blessed with three beautiful children (two now) and I’ve never felt closer to Eric. Not to mention the friends and family who have been there when we’ve needed them. I wish things were different and our Kaufman family didn’t have to be in this experience and that’s the part of this story that makes it the worst two months of my life. But today was a wonderful day so I don’t want to visit that dark place right now.
After a night of not sleeping and being sick to my stomach over our little boy, I drove like mad to the hospital this morning and broke down for the hundredth time to our supercool neonatologist (he laughs and cries right along with us). Luckily as Eric already posted, the results of Cole’s headscan were okay. I could finally breathe. To make the day even better– I was able to hold both Paige and Cole for two hours each today. So Paige was first. We had a great time snuggling together until we hit the 2 hr mark, then she starting fussing. Turns out the reason for her fussiness was that she pooped unbelievable amounts and was leaking through her diaper. Somehow she managed to not poop on me which was really lucky because her poop was not only really stinky but was really gross looking. We managed to clean her up only to have her soil her diaper again like 20 minutes later. What great bowels!! It’s really great to have her poop that much because it means she’s digesting her food well. Remind me in six months when she’s home and still pooping like crazy how great it is! Next up for the Kangaroo cuddle was Cole. He was hilarious. The nurses placed him on my chest about breast level and he crawled all the way up my body until his head was under my throat. The nurses moved him and again he crawled his way up under my throat so I figured that he either really likes that spot or he was trying to get me to stop humming to him (I know better than to try singing to him, I thought humming would be more bearable).
So Paige’s labs didn’t show any signs of infection and I have a theory behind her being up and down on her oxygen saturation’s last night. I think she had Mommy withdrawal since I was able to hold her for an hour yesterday. Once she knows that I will hold her every day hopefully she will be more stable as we get into our routine.
If I don’t post for a while again…thanks to all for your prayers and thoughts. Love, Tobie
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Best post ever!
Hi Tob…..
My parents, my sisters, Jason & I have been thinking of you all so much latley. Please know that I am here for you any time. Even if it is to wash your hair!
Whenever you want to talk please call & know that we love you all so much!
Love,
Gina
Blair
I’m so glad to hear that things are going well.
Being able to hold your babies is something that so many parents take for granted. I know I did prior to our babies early arrival! I’m glad that you enjoyed the experience as much as Paige and Cole. Those are the NICU experiences that you NEVER want to forget. Enjoy them!
Stacy
Tobie,
BRILLIANT! You can fill in for Eric any time he just can’t make to the BLOG - you both are soooo amazing. And it sounds like your little ones were so happy to be in mommy’s arms (and even under her chin!)
Thanks for sharing all the ups and downs.
You are all so very loved!
I’m very glad that today turned out to be a good one.
Tell Paige the serial-pooper not to worry so much about the repeated bowel movements; I got her a ton of diapers.
Who’da thunk poop could be such an occasion to celebrate?
I’m glad you’re able to hold your children. We are not yet at that stage.
Dear Tobie,
I am so envious of you, as my NICU continues to poo-poo (no pun intended) the kangeroo holding for some time “until they’re more stable.” It is so hard to not be at the hospital every waking moment, and harder still to be there but not be able to hold my girls. With all of the ups and downs, and all of the stress, I’m glad that you able to have some very meaningful time with your children.
Thinking of you from miles away…
Pam